RUTHIE HAYDEN, CLIENT

Ruthie Hayden lived through a mother’s worst nightmare. Four years ago, her 22-year-old daughter, Bianca, unexpectedly died. Ruthie just couldn’t bear the loss of her only daughter.

Overcome with grief, she succumbed to the symptoms of bipolar disorder, which she'd been diagnosed with years earlier. She fought hard to keep taking her medications to manage her illness, but her depression after Bianca's death was too powerful.

"When she died," Ruthie says, "I died."

Ruthie lost her job and then her home. She stopped taking her medications altogether and began cycling uncontrollably between depression and mania. She went to live on the streets. She roamed Cheshire Bridge Road, knocking on the back doors of restaurants and asking for food.

She had nowhere to bathe or brush her teeth regularly.

Afraid for her safety on the streets, she found no security among police, because she knew that if they encountered her in the wrong crowd at the wrong time, and lacking an address or identification, they would jail her.

Eventually, she and her fiancé found rooms in a house for rent. Ruthie thought she'd finally be able to get her life back on track.

"No one ever wants to be homeless," she says.

But the landlord fell behind in mortgage payments and lost the house in foreclosure. Ruthie returned to the streets.

In March 2009, Ruthie, now 50, came to the Gateway Center. With her caseworker, she first focused on regaining control of her disorder. "They gave me a support base," Ruthie says. "Somewhere I could live and eat, and work on getting my mental health back together." She's back on medication and sees a therapist once a month.

For the first time in months, Ruthie is hopeful about her future. But she knows her journey to self-sufficiency isn't complete. She says she needs to improve her focus and concentration so that she can return to school. She dreams of getting a job in which she helps people, particularly those diagnosed with HIV/AIDS.

"I have to look ahead," Ruthie says, smiling. "[Bianca] would want me to."